• E-mail me!
  • Construction time again

    Freakin' blogger!

    They tell me to pick a new template. I read that they will save my old template, in case I don't like the new one. I pick a new one (exactly like my old one--I really liked the color scheme), and then discover that I had to save the old template, not blogger.

    So now all my links are gone. My email is gone. My counter is gone. Hell, I added a properly formatted home link, and it won't even work.

    bugger bugger bugger bugger bugger feck!

    So, check back with me next week. I don't have time this week to fix this piece o'crap. I'll try to have it back up and running by Wednesday. Until then, enjoy the repeats. Add some comments to some old posts.

    That, apparently, is the only thing still working here.

    EDIT: Still working on the details. Home link still doesn't work, can't get my countdown clock to load in, etc. But most of the links are back, at least the ones I could remember. Oh, and apparently, I'm no longer Mystique, I'm Spiderman. Great. Just great.

    didn't see that one coming

    So I'm fueling up the family campster the other day and I notice this ultra-huge mcmansion of a truck pull in to the other side of the pump. The driver's door opens, and out pops... someone shorter than me!

    I'm a towering 5'2" and this lady barely came up to my nose. Driving a jacked-up ginornormosity. She was also wearing a name tag which had her last name on it: "Midgette."

    Can we say, "overcompensation"?

    Bad, bad, wicked Zoot!

    Turns out I really am a complete and total idiot.

    So I miss Pirate Day because I think it's Dec. 5.

    Well, it's not (scroll down).

    But you know what is on Dec. 5?

    International Ninja Day.

    You just know they're making a special place in
    Hell just for me right now.

    Sing with me now!
    "na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na, hey hey hey, you're a noob!"

    Bloody hell!

    Feck feck feck feck feck.

    How the hell did I manage to screw this up? Jesus Christ, you'd think I'm a moran or something.

    For some reason, I had it in my head that International Talk Like A Pirate Day was Dec. 5th.

    It's #%$&@#% TODAY!

    And I missed it. Merlin's pants!

    That's it. I'm walkin' the plank.

    Your message intrigues me and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

    Iranian leaders declare that one day, lad, all this will be yours.

    In all seriousness, Iranian leaders are claiming that in the not-too-distant future, G-Dub and his cronies will be brought up on human rights violations and war crimes for activities in Iraq.

    This is interesting on many levels, and I will be watching this closely.

    Because the mind is a terrible thing

    I do not watch a lot of television, and I haven't watched MTV since about 1989. Thanks to Fark, I was tempted into watching the Britney Spears clip from the MTV music awards held recently.

    Never mind that she has agreed that being barely dressed and gyrating around the stage is how she bests sells her music. Never mind how she did look pretty good compared to some who'd given birth to two children in a short span of time, and when compared to some of the anorexic waifs the media has labeled 'beautiful.'

    What kept me shaking my head in horror was just how stoned she appeared to be. She could not complete any of the dip-type moves; it seemed as though she had a steel rod inserted the length of her spine. She could barely keep her feet, either, and would stagger in a tipsy fashion whenever she was required to walk from one space to the next. Long before the end, it was obvious she wasn't really singing.

    Yes, I know many stars lip-synch at awards shows. I also know that some choose to sing. I'm thankful she was not one of them. Adding 'remember the lyrics to my own damn song' to her mix last night would have been the ultimate disaster, although it's hard to imagine anything worse.

    I just find it so very sad and pathetic that a person with so much potential could have thrown her life away for.... What? What did she gain with all the drugs and the alcohol and the head-shaving crazy? If she can't perform live without allegedly doping or being drunk, should she have custody of her kids?

    One of the Farkers likened Ms Spears' life to a train wreck. I would have laughed if it wasn't so very sadly true.

    The right help is out there if she really wants it.

    I'll have that in the can


    I am in a strange mood.


    I have a brother named for an obscure Canadian hockey player from the 1950s, a sister with no middle name, a sister named after an uncle's unrequited love, a sister named after a guy my dad met somewhere he can't recall, and a brother who wasn't named after anybody in particular although my dad is pretty certain those are "family names," whose obstetrician during the birth was rip-roaring drunk.

    I'm probably the lucky one of the bunch. I was named after the soon-to-be-ex-wife of a "beloved" uncle. The uncle in question was a drug pusher and an alcoholic who liked to wake up to a nice, cold 40 oz every day, and whose skin is such an unusual color it can only be described as 'Christmas red,' and who really freaks my kids out just by smiling at them. The now-remarried ex-wife, I've heard, has long since become a lawyer.


    Well, I did warn you.


    So I wake up early on a holiday. Can you believe it?! A whole summer goes by with practically every flippin' day an unintended sleep-in (darn snooze button), and I wake early on a holiday. God hates me.

    I decide that the only way to make it worse for myself is to take the monkeys to Busch Gardens. On their last official business day of summer. When it's about 90F outside with only light winds off the mainland and not the ocean.

    The kids seemed rather excited to go, actually. They were ready before I was, and even ate breakfast faster than usual. At the toll, we found ourselves one car back from a carload of family friends, so I had some grownups to hang out with, and my kids had someone else to annoy.

    The park was divided into must-do's and borings, and then we set off. The really neat thing is that The Baby has finally grown that last half-inch and is now tall enough to ride all the coasters, including the new one. Boy, did she have a great time. We all did. It was a lovely day, which we ended by having a lovely barbeque at a lovely friend's house to celebrate the return of her lovely spouse from an unlovely remote PCS.

    Sometimes yesterdays can be so perfect. I'm really glad that happens.