The Big Throwdown

We've been friends for a long time. Well, long for me, anyway. We talk about things while not intensely prying into our deepest affairs. I think that's what keeps us civil, don't you?

But I cannot remain uninformed no longer. I have to know!

Are you eligible to vote? If so, did you register? If you registered, did you vote?

If you answered yes to the first two but no to the last, please don't talk to me, I'm mad at you right now.

If you answered yes to the first but no to the second, please slap yourself rather hard once and then don't talk to me, I'm mad at you right now.

If, however, you are ineligible, please be patient, your time will hopefully come. And when it does, I hope you do not shirk your single most important contribution to America.

I voted this morning. I arrived right at opening, and only waited about 45 minutes for my turn. My precinct had 6 running booths and one spare. I wish I could have voted twice, it was so exciting!

The neighboring county hosted "early voting" last week, averaging over 3,000 voters each of the five days. I'm very eager to read the final national tally. I anticipate that today's voters are going to turn out in record numbers, and, quite frankly, it's about damn time. I've always been of the opinion that as the population grows, so too should the number of people who actually cast a vote. Unfortunately, the opposite happens year after year.

If you are registered but have not yet made your way to the polls, please go. Brave the weather, wear comfy shoes, take a book, hell--even take a lawn chair. Just go!

And if you are eligible but did not register, please be aware that in my opinion you have no recourse for complaint if you do not approve of your upcoming government and its policies. You did not help try to shape it, you can't complain about it later if it turns out to really suck.

But here's to hope that it all turns out well, eh?